Eavesdropping Forensics: Searching For Gold


As someone who likes to call himself a writer, I like to do writing exercises. One of my favorite exercises that I learned while getting my useless English Degree was to watch strangers.

That may need some explaining. You are supposed to actually go out in public and observe how normal people act and converse. This way your characters can act and talk normally. It was one of my favorite things to do because I liked to come up with the most outlandish scenarios I could, like Sherlock Holmes mixed with Don Quixote. So, with all of that said, I am going to make this a regular series. Here goes nothing:

*PSA: The following is completely fiction and is in no way is real. Any relation to real people and events are completely coincidental*

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(Now I know that it is creepy that I have this picture of two people toasting one another but this is zoomed in from a larger picture I took at the Bellagio)

I am going to start with this zoomed in vacation photo. This is mostly because I am breaking one of two requirements and choosing not to leave my house. I really like this photo and for my investigation I am going to stick to the man because I have the clearest picture of him. Now, on to the evidence.

The Clues:

  1. Extremely Happy: This man has a smile on his face that could melt the polar ice caps faster than global warming. He must be either newly married or on a date. As a married man I know that married couples do not toast like that. I would only toast like that if my wife suddenly said “you know, a threesome sounds nice tonight. Let’s go to the strip club.” Most people do not go to Las Vegas to go on a date and I doubt he would waste so much time and money on taking a hooker to a high class restaurant, even on a high class escort. He is definitely a newly-wed.
  2. Appearance: She is very nicely dressed. He is business casual. This seems like a mismatch to me. Also, the body language is all wrong. She has great posture and is sitting straighter than a pole. He is leaning forward with a slight slouch. She is upper class and he reeks of middle management. She is out of his league.
  3. Location: Let’s get the obvious out of the way. Newly weds + Las Vegas = traditional Las Vegas wedding. A quick down and dirty wedding with no frills. No family, no fanfare, no foresight.

The big problem here is why? They both look like upstanding adults, not the type to run off to Vegas to get married. So why? There is only one possible solution. He won the Lottery! This is completely obvious for a couple of reasons.

  1. They are eating at a piano bar in the middle of the Bellagio. Not cheap.
  2. She is high class. He is not.
  3. They got married in Vegas having not known one another for a long time.

So, conclusion. He has won the lottery, she has courted him, and they ran off to Vegas to get married. A classic Rose situation from Titanic. She is from old money which has recently run out. She wants to keep up the lifestyle that she has grown accustomed to and found this man who has won the lottery. He is impressed with her class and sophistication and with all of his new money wants to live the high life. She is worried that he will change his mind and dump her for a bikini model and leave her high and dry. So she tied him down. Quick Vegas wedding, no prenups. Classic.

CASE CLOSED

Anyway, thank you for reading and if you like this post I plan on posting these on every Friday, so keep a look out. Please feel free to check out my new website design and some of my other posts. Likes and shares are always appreciated.

~Chris Joy

Categories: Dorky, Eavesdropping Forensics, Humor, Short StoryTags: , , ,

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